“Hello, I’m Timothy Hoang. Thank you for giving me this opportunity to share with you the story how I came to know Christ.”
And that was how I typed my testimony on baptism day. So this is going to be the start of my religious blogs? I know that I said that I’d make Christian blog posts, like, a month ago? Soooorryyyyy. (Time to make my futile excuse) It’s just that (with an overly dramatic tone), it’s hard to start a long-term habit. Starting large projects or ideas is always the difficult part because you want it to be productive and worthwhile. (I hope this excuse was believable; because it’s true, the beginning is the hardest part). So, as an introduction to Christian blogs on Second-Hand Sermons, I’ll be using the speech I wrote on baptism day, combined with my present-day terrible sense of humor! 😀 (P.S. This testimony was written on May 13th of 2012, so of course I have to tweak it a little bit). Also, if you’re not a Christian, you don’t have to read this blog post. You are given a choice whether to read on or not; I’m just putting my Christian belief on the web for people interested to read this. Alrighty then, Here we go:
“I was born into a Christian family, meaning I have been going to Church with my parents ever since I was a deformed fetus that was doomed destined to become the person I am today. Continue reading →
Disclaimer! This is not a goodbye because I’m terrible with goodbye’s. So think of these blog posts as a “thank-you-for-everything-that-you’ve-done-for-me-and-I’ll-never-forget-you” kind of thing. I will definitely see you again in the future so don’t you dare think that I’m just going to disappear from the surface of the Earth. If you want to read all the blog posts I’ve made about my “departure,” then please scroll down to “Categories” and pick “Timothy’s Letter to the Church.” This series of blog posts will be personal and only a select few will understand what I’m saying, so, sorry to those who have no clue of what I’m talking about!
Um…I’m not sure if you’ll be O.K. with me putting you on my blog and the internet in general, but what ever! 😀 Since I have a lot of people to talk about, I need to place a limit on how many words I’ll write for each person, so does a max of 800 words per person sound good? Including the “Disclaimer” that will be at the beginning and the introduction of each blog post? No? Well this is my blog so sucks for you 😛
As you can see, I’m trying to apply as much humor I can so that I’ll be able to publicly embarrass you aaaand make sure you don’t forget me. 😀 Don’t worry, I’ll save the last 100 words for a nice paragraph announcing my love for you. Let’s begin with the embarrassing moments shall we?
So…how’s Joy doing? I think I’ll call this moment the “I Spy an Awkward Couple” moment. O.K. I’m aware that you said you guys weren’t a thing, and I respect that, but at least show it? During Easter Picnic, you and Joy were sitting on a bench alone just talking near the lake. So me, Ethan, and Hope decide to spy on you! Yaaay! I’m pretty sure you guys were aware of us creeping towards you guys, but I think the point was to make it as awkward as possible. Whoops?
Another interesting moment you shared with me: the “Dare to go Nude” incident. According to you, when you adamantly told your parents you didn’t want to go on a family vacation. They surprisingly left you home alone for a day. “Surprisingly.” So you decided to go nude for the whole day and left things “hanging out.” After announcing your nude-home-alone-decision during teens, you also mentioned that it “felt good to relax and feel free.” Thank you so much for sharing that with me, but I have just shared it with the entire internet (well, at least people who bother looking at my pitiful blog…)
This one is my fault: “Finnick O-There is Your Toe!” I’m pretty sure you’ve read the “Hunger Games” by Suzanne Collins; great series ya’ know. And I’m pretty sure you also know that District 4 is known for fishing and killing their enemies with tridents and spears. Well, this all relates to the incident where I nearly spear your toe off. (Again, so sorry) During Church Beautification day, we were helping get rid of the weeds in the front lawn. I decide to be cool, and I accurately threw my pitch fork at the weeds…that were under your foot… (omg so sorry) I ended up piercing a hole through your shoe and you could feel the cold metal between your toes. Sigh…I’m so deranged.
I’m gonna hold this against you for the rest of your life: the “Time To Leave the Stage!” incident. Unfortunately, Sylvie didn’t notice it; she doesn’t usually notice anything that’s going on, but anywaaays. We were singing “One Thing Remains” infront of the ENTIRE Vietnamese Christian congregation for Hoi Dong, so probably about 200-300 people. After we were finished, everyone stood on the stage to wait for the worship team to come up and take out mics. But, to mess things up, you just haaaaad to leave the stage early, making everything super awkward: a true aca-awkward moment. So, everyone tries unsuccessfully to contain their laughter, but then bursts into laughter off stage. How could this get worse you ask? It was broadcasted on television on the Vietnamese channel. So probably most of SoCal saw this!
OOH! I FORGOT THIS ONE MOMENT. ADDING THIS EVEN THOUGH I ALREADY PUBLISHED THIS! Sooo we were in Middle School and hanging out at the Church’s parking lot. I notice some cattail looking weeds and I told you,
“Oh hey! Did you know these plants can cut through rope?
And then you doubted me, saying “No.” So like my deranged self, I decided to prove to you that the blades of the plant can actually cut you. So I took a leaf and swiped it across your arm…making you bleed. I’M SO SORRY! — I feel like I harm you too much…
OMG WHAT, A SIXTH ONE POPPED INTO MY MIND. You really are one ako-taco. It was in the winter and we were in the mountains with Jeremy. After we decided there was too little snow to play with (we were literally collecting snow from patches to bring back to the cabin), we were to an adventure to the lake! The result of this was very high pitched screams…i regret everything. We decided it would be a fun idea to walk on the ice of the lake, even though there was a sign saying “DON’T WALK ON THIN ICE.” The tension was real. Each step felt like the lake was gonna break; each step sounded like the ice was gonna give up. After you got your shoe soaked, we finally decided to get out of that terrible mess of ice. We’re such idiots lol…
This is the part where I turn off my terrible attempt to be funny. Matthew Nguyen, we’re the same age and we’ve known each other for a very very very long time. I remember when I was younger, I went up to your dad and said “Excuse me…sir? Where’s Matthew?” I wanted to play with you; to be with you because we were best friends. Now I have a new meaning to best friends: my second family and you were the one who made me realize this. Thank you so much for putting up with my sass in class and all my embarrassing fails. I love you, and I hope we’re still going on that road trip!
I dedicate this song to you (so you won’t forget your fail):
It’s not the exact song we sang, but message is still the same: listen to instructions before acting the opposite -__-
Disclaimer! This is not a goodbye because I’m terrible with goodbye’s. So think of these blog posts as a “thank-you-for-everything-that-you’ve-done-for-me-and-I’ll-never-forget-you” kind of thing. I will definitely see you again in the future so don’t you dare think that I’m just going to disappear from the surface of the Earth. If you want to read all the blog posts I’ve made about my “departure,” then please scroll down to “Categories” and pick “Timothy’s Letter to the Church.” This series of blog posts will be personal and only a select few will understand what I’m saying, so, sorry to those who have no clue of what I’m talking about!
Um…I’m not sure if you’ll be O.K. with me putting you on my blog and the internet in general, but what ever! 😀 Since I have a lot of people to talk about, I need to place a limit on how many words I’ll write for each person, so does a max of 800 words per person sound good? Including the “Disclaimer” that will be at the beginning and the introduction of each blog post? No? Well this is my blog so sucks for you 😛
As you can see, I’m trying to apply as much humor I can so that I’ll be able to publicly embarrass you aaaand make sure you don’t forget me. 😀 Don’t worry, I’ll save the last 100 words for a nice paragraph announcing my love for you. Let’s begin with the embarrassing moments shall we?
Let’s start with the most recent one: “The Accidental Baby Falling Incident!” Remember when I was at you’re house for a goodbye dinner with your parents. And you were holding baby Jaxon/Jackson. And you said,
“Oh look! He can stand”
The precise moment you lift your hands, the poor baby tilts to the side and your mom yells are you for disturbing the poor child.
Another one! This is called the “I Think My Mic was Off.” Remember at Hoi Dong and we were singing “One Thing Remains.” Well, there was one thing remaining, your voice! LOL. We discovered that we were missing the tenor part, you, of our song.
Remember during Bible Challenge 2014 and I was sitting in the back as a substitute? I’ll call this whoopsies the “The Woman Mix-Up.” The question was about Deborah, the fourth judge in the book of Judges and the only female judge. You and David looked at each other like,
“WE KNOW THIS ANSWER!”
But then, of course you guys had to doubt yourself and say,
“WAIT. OR WAS IT DELILAH!?”
Then broken out the debate of Deborah vs. Delilah. We buzz in. Answer with “Delilah.” Get it wrong. And of course, to make things worse, the team in last place gets it right with “Deborah.” Great teamwork you two!
This one is my absolute favorite: the “THERES A TIE IN MY PHO!” I don’t remember the exact date and time this happened, but we were eating Pho for dinner at Church one time near the Teens Room. We walk into the room and place our bowls onto the table; we can call this the “calm before the storm.” Then, the tip of your tie dips into your Pho and you scream,
“OH NO!”
So you flipped your tie over your shoulder to prevent it from getting wet, but unsuccessfully because the tie drapes into your dinner again! You quickly smack the tie out to prevent it from getting wet. Great, it worked.
But, unfortunately, you thought your tie was still in the Pho. Being a “cautious” guy, your flicked your hand a third time to smack the invisible tie out of the way. In the process of this, you ended up giving a hard smack to your bowl, flipping the entire thing to the ground. There were noodles all over the ground and I was also on the ground, laughing.
OOOOH I REMEMBER ONE MORE ILLEGAL EVENT WE DID IN THE PAST AFTER PUBLISHING THIS! At the word illegal, you should know what already LOL. I sooo hope we don’t get into trouble since I’m sharing this publicly…might as well. remember at Sports Fest 2014 we were in track with Matthew and Ethan? And we decided to practice on the track? Well, we discovered that the track was locked, but wouldn’t give up so we went around. Before we could find another entrance, Matthew and Ethan rush towards the wall, jump over, and get inside the track. Being reasonable, we try going around. After “going around” failed, our next idea was just stupid. We had our arms on the edge of the wall and we were just dangling there like…idiots? Literally, we just dangling on the wall thinking “uhh…what do we do.” Then, unknowingly, a policeman catches us. Ooooh crap, we’re in big trouble. Then the policeman lectures us about prison, trespassing, and said we weren’t in trouble because we didn’t enter…but who already entered… MATTHEW AND ETHAN!!!!! After the police shake up, we walked calmly around the corner, and then started devising ideas on how to sneak Matthew and Ethan out. You called Matthew’s phone and we both started whispering directions.
“Oh my gosh there are police”
“GET OUT QUICKLY!”
“Go through the exit”
“WAIT DON’T, THERE’S A PATROL CART!!!!”
“Jump over the wall again at our signal!”
“Wait till the patrol cart is gone.”
“okay…GO GO GO GO!!!”
Okay…time for the part of this blog post and where things get deep. Longlee, you have been like an older brother that I’ve always wanted (despite the mistakes I listed out above). You were there to help me with my multiple problems and FaceBook rants. When you told me that I was just like you, my heart exploded in knowing that there was someone like me that experienced the same problems. When we sang together for our attempted “Oceans” cover, we discovered we had similar voices the blended together and couldn’t figure who was singing melody and harmony — I cherish this memory so much because it showed that no matter where I go, I’ll have your voice guiding me and giving me advice. Thank you for being such a great leader in teens. I love you!
How many of you guys know a person who keeps asking for free stuff from you? You’re homework? You’re lunch? Borrowing money and never giving it back? In “The Count of Monte Cristo” by Alexandre Dumas, there are so many of those “free-loaners” that I wonder how much did they steal from their “friends.” Since Caderousse is dead and out of the picture, the next greedy and money-centered person is Baron Danglars, an extremely wealthy banker. To me and probably every other who reads this book can just tell that Danglars is an annoying and self-centered person who only cares about saving money. This is how I’ll show my hatred towards Danglars: “Bills, Bills, Bills” by Destiny’s Child.
The video above is the original song, but I feel like the Glee version is more suitable for “The Count of Monte Cristo” because the Glee version is sung by males. The reason why I like the Glee version better for this blog post is because I imagine all the men constantly complaining and getting frustrated because Danglars keeps asking more money, keeps withholding money from charities, and tries to cheat people by giving them a lower amount of money than they actually deserve. (Even though the lyrics are for females to sing…but think of it in the context that it’s about guys who are mad at each other because of one’s constant need and financial reliance on the other)
Music and Life: The Remix 